Beyond Repair
by Hemeophage
Summary: Bella is raped and Alice sees it only part of it. When she thinks Bella has cheated on Edward, what will become of it? Rape, Cutting, anorexic Bella anorexia maybe attempted suicide. R&R! Flames accepted.
1. Chapter 1

Edward wasn't due to pick her up for a couple of hours. Bella had finished all of her chores and decided to take a walk. She carefully watched where she stepped, as she climbed over a fallen log with overgrown foliage. She wasn't keeping track of time, just mindlessly walking through the forest. She heard a bit of crackling behind her, so Bella turned around. There was nothing there. She just assumed it was an animal, until she heard the crackling again.

A hand wrapped around her mouth and muffled the scream that followed. The stranger, defiantly a man, pushed her to the ground, and tied her hands above her head. Bella let out a strangled sob as the man gagged her with a piece from her now ripped shirt. Her roughly caressed her wet cheek and kissed her, leaving a trail of slobber down her neck. He grabbed a pocket knife from his pocket and quickly ripped her shirt apart.

He wasted no time with the bra. It also was disposed of. He groped her breast unyieldingly and pinched her nipples, until they felt like they would burst from pain and pressure. Leaning down to her twin mounds, he suckled her flesh hard. Bella cried out in pain when he bit her nipple hard.

The man untied her gag, but muted any cries for help by kissing her hard and rough. This brought more tears to Bella's eyes. He then moves down to her lower regions and takes her pants off. He just ripped her flimsy underwear to get at her jewel.

Alice was happily talking to her mate Jasper, when she was hit with a vision. A moan dominated her senses. She could tell that it was Bella; then she saw a man, sucking her sister's cunt! What was going on? How could Bella do this to Edward? The little pixie was suddenly very grateful that her brother had gone to hunt. He didn't have to see this awful scene, and Alice could have time to figure out how to break it to him, the rest of the family for that matter.

The man didn't even make sure she was lubricated, before he shoved his member into her virginal opening. Bella screamed out in heartbreaking pain, as her cherry was popped. He continued to bury himself to the hilt relentlessly. Bella was left on the dirty, cold floor of the forest, after he had comed twice.

She just lied there for about an hour, trying to get up, but handicapped completely by the pain in her abdomen. Bella was eventually able to get up and move, but she did so very carefully, so as not to aggravate the pain any more.

Tears coursed their way down her face. She opened the front door to her house, to find that Charlie was not there; he left a note saying that he went to La Push to go fishing with Billy Black and Harry Clearwater.

She went to the bathroom and turned the water as hot as it could go. She felt a desperate need to make herself 'clean' again. She wanted all of the man's touches to be gone, and she felt that if she could just scrub it all away, she would be clean again. Bella stepped into the shower, her skin turning red at the burning water. She grabbed her sponge and went to work at scrubbing her skin off. Only when the water began to turn red did she stop scrubbing. Even though she didn't feel clean, she wanted to see Edward, Alice and the rest of the Cullens.

Bella selected a pair of black skinny jeans and a long sleeved, gray and red, t-shirt. She wiped some tears off her cheeks, hopped into to her tuck, and started her car. Making her way down the familiar road, she wondered if Alice had seen it yet. 'Does Edward know?'

She started to panic. 'Why would he want me now?' She was impure in her mind; she wanted to give her virginity to her soul mate, not a rapist.

Her loud Chevy rumbled its way up her adoptive family's long driveway. Bella never once wondered why Edward had not come to get her, she only thought of if he would still love her.

No one comes out to greet her, but the brunette pays no attention to that. She knocks at their door. A hard faced Alice answered the door with a quick, "What do you want?"

Bella was in shock. Never, not even when they had first met, had the short vampire ever spoken to her in such a way. "A-Alice?"

"How could you think of coming here after what you did to Edward? Do you know what you did to him?"

"W-what?" Bella couldn't comprehend why they were yelling at her? Oh, Edward didn't want her because she lost her innocence.

"You had sex with that man!" Alice screamed in her face. Why was Bella acting like she didn't know what was going on?

Jasper, meanwhile, was shocked at how much pain Bella was in. When she came in, she was feeling helplessness, worry, grief, self – hatred along with regular hatred, and sorrow. As Alice continued to chew Bella out, her pain just grew and grew.

As Edward walked in with a crestfallen expression, Bella's pain seemed to peak and fear joined it.

"How could you Bella?" His voice cracked twice with the inquisition.

"I-I-I d-d, H-he r-ra –"

"Don't lie." Alice interrupted scathingly.

Jasper then felt all of Bella's pain, worry, fear, and everything else just disappear. It was like she had a numbing balm over her.

"I'm sorry." For once, she didn't stutter and looked toward her feet as she spoke. She looked up and Jasper had to look closely at her face, but he swear he saw resignation in her eyes. Bella looked at all of his family's faces, like she would never see them again, and left in her red truck.


	2. Chapter 2

**Sadly, I don't anything but the plotline.**

Bella drove through the streets with a dead look on her face. Her already wounded heart had shattered when the Cullens had said all those things to her. When she parked, she wiped the oncoming flow of tears from her cheeks, but they just kept coming. The brunette tried to compose herself, but a few sobs escaped. Bella walked up the drive to her house, unlocked the door, and went inside.

"Dad?" His car had been in the driveway; where was he? She called out for him again, but received no answer. Walking into the empty kitchen, she wrapped her hands around her mouth and screamed. Charlie was on the floor, blood pouring out of his neck. Bella cried out with grief, she didn't understand how all this could happen.

She felt his wrists, but felt no pulse. Her father was dead. Bella felt that she had no fight left in her and sat on the ground, rocking back and forth. She couldn't cope with all the pain she felt. She was all alone.

'I can't do this alone!' She thought despairingly. Bella grabbed a large, sharp knife off of the counter and brought it to her wrist. She had no one in the world anymore, except Renee. But her mother would heal, and Phil would help her do so.

Bella pressed the sharp edge hard into her flesh and sliced with a quick jerk. She repeated the motion on her other wrist.

She wondered who would eventually find her as she fell asleep.

With her wrists and head aching with pain, Bella opened her eyes and blinked to clear her vision. She heard a deep chuckle to her left. Turning, her heart plummeted at who she saw.

It was a man with thinning sandy hair and dull silver eyes, the evil eyes of her rapist.

"Did you think you could just escape me? How did you like that little gift I left you downstairs?"

Bella just stared at him; her throat had closed up and she had no idea what to say. She didn't want to respond with something that he thought as 'unacceptable' and make him angry.

"My name is Drogo, but you will refer to me as master. You will cater to my every will and need. Oh, and before I forget, you will also give my friends any and all services they require." Drogo said with a twisted smile.

He trapped her hands above her head, purposely pressing his palms into her bandaged injuries. He had stripped his prisoner in her sleep, so her unbuckled his belt and slid into her while she was dry.

Bella screamed out, and this just made Drogo laugh. After a while, the pain made her pass out and she did not wake up the next day.

She had to beg her captor to let her plan and go to her father's funeral. He let her, but with a horrible condition. His friend's were able to rape, maim, and do whatever else they wanted to Bella. Even with that as a consequence, she took it and planned the ceremony.

Bella had to find a dress with long sleeves, for she had started to pick up cutting and burning to help with all the emotional pain she was going through.

There was a bitter taste in her mouth as she greeted people at the church's doorway. Her stomach kept rolling and she couldn't stop glancing at the corpse in the wood casket. Charlie's body made her even queasier, but Bella didn't want to miss her last glimpses of his face.

She leaned on the wall to regain her balance. Drogo had punished her severely last night for not preparing his dinner, and she had dizziness from heavy blood loss.

A soft clearing of a throat dragged Bella out of her thoughts and she looked up, only to see a sight she was not prepared to see. All the Cullens had come, even Alice and Edward. She winced; it hurt to say all their names, especially Edwards.

Esme and Carlisle stepped forward, and handed her a vase of yellow roses. "We are so sorry for your loss."

Bella didn't know what to say back, so she just nodded her thanks. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Rose sneer at her.

They walked away, and grabbed a couple of seats in the back. Renee did come (with Phil), but decided that since she was Charlie's ex, she shouldn't sit in the front row. That left Bella sitting alone with no one to comfort her.

After the minister was done, she went up to a little table set up near her father's coffin. On it were little shot glasses full of whiskey. She had trouble keeping herself collected as they lifted their shots into the air and swallowed the liquid.

After everyone left, Bella eased herself to the floor, as tears slipped down her face. She hung her face in her hands.

'How could my life get any worse?'

"Bella?" She heard a tentative voice ask.

Said person looked up with puffy eyes and saw the Cullen family.

"Yes?" She didn't think she could handle this right now. Bella was barely keeping herself from collapsing with sobs as it was.

"Are you okay?"

"No." How could they expect her to be okay? She had just lost her dad after losing them! And, even though they didn't know, she was being raped constantly. "How could I be? My father just died! And I assume you won't lower yourself enough to take a shot, so could you just leave."

Bella pointedly ignored the body, not ten feet away from her, and stood up. She took the tray of shots and started to down them one by one.

"B-bella! You can't just drink that much alcohol all at once!" Carlisle exclaimed.

"So?" Bella winced as the fiery spirit went down her throat. "It's not like you guys will drink it."

The Cullens couldn't get any more out of Bella. When they shot Jasper looks for him to get her to be a little bit more cooperative, he just mouthed, 'In the car.'


	3. Chapter 3

**Set a couple of days after the funeral. **

After they left, Bella sat down. She was absolutely exhausted and couldn't fathom the idea of going home. Though that place didn't feel like home anymore, not after Drogo had come. Her life had been completely ruined and she had no one to lean on. Not even her mother.

**Flashback**

_Bella was distraught. Drogo had just left, leaving her alone to stare at her father's blood on the kitchen linoleum. The funeral was in a few days and Bella still couldn't believe that this was happening. A knock on her front door brought Bella out of her day dreams._

_She opened the door, to see her mother. Bella didn't want Renee to see the blood, so she walked out of the house and closed the door behind._

"_I thought I would give you guys a surprise visit!" Renee said with much enthusiasm._

"_Mom . . . Charlie's dead."_

_Renee's eyes popped open really wide. She had never anticipated this. "Well," she paused, trying to pick out her words carefully, "At least I'll get my daughter back!"_

"_What? What do you mean?"_

"_What, it's not like Charlie was a great father. I mean you don't even like Forks."_

"_Well,_mom_, my opinion has changed. And Charlie was a wonderful dad to me! If you are just going to desecrate his memory, then leave." Bella didn't even care if her mom was her only escape. She wasn't just going to stand there and let her mom badmouth Charlie._

_She still allowed Renee to come to the funeral, but it wasn't an easy thing for her to do._

**End Flashback**

Bella opened the door and was relieved that Drogo was not there. A heavy sigh escaped her lips, as she turned on the lights.

"Bella, why is there blood everywhere?" a voice said from the living room. She spun towards it, to see someone she would have never guessed. Jasper Cullen was sitting on her couch.

"Bella, whose blood is it and why is it on every surface I can see?"

She had no answer that wouldn't make him even more suspicious. When she suddenly felt the need to pour out all her secrets, Drogo walked in. He had a sleazy smile on his face, until he saw Jasper in 'his' house.

Jasper could feel the fury and aggression rolling off of him in waves. He tried to calm the man down, but the anger did not die down; however, this stranger kept his face calm, collected, and friendly. Jasper's face crinkled in concentration, fore he realized that this man in front of him sort of sounded like the man Alice described to him and his family. He couldn't understand why a girl like Bella would want to be with this malicious man.

"I'm sorry, but what is your name?" Drogo asked.

"My name is Jasper; I'm a friend of Bella's."

Drogo laughed in his head and thought, 'Just wait till tonight Bella. You'll wish you had never been born.' He had to punish her for letting someone in the house, especially a Cullen. He had heard of them from a bartender in Port Angeles and how they had been really close to his captive.

"Well I'm so sorry, but Bella and I have a previous engagement." If only they did. Jasper could tell that this man was anything but sorry. He was just about to stop the guy and demand answers, when he saw Bella's look. Her eyes were telling him to leave, pleading with him. Unbeknownst to him until now, she had also started to tremble badly. He decided to abide by her wishes and leave.

"I'll see you around Bella." Jasper was then basically pushed out of the house. Only when he was standing outside, he realized that he had never even gleaned the man's name.

_At the Cullen House hold_

Carlisle was in his office filling out piles of paperwork, when he heard urgent knocks on his door.

"Come in." Jasper opened the door with a very worried look on his face.

"What's wrong?"

"I went to Bella's house today, and what I saw was very weird."

Jasper continued, "Her house seems to be coated in dried blood, a lot of it was Bella's. Then she walked in feeling very worried, looked around, and her emotions changed to relief. I questioned her about the blood, but a man walked in." Jasper kept explaining about the man's actions to get him out of the house and Bella's pleading gaze.

Carlisle was baffled. Even though Bella had cheated on his son, he still loved her like a daughter. He had no clue what was going on with Bella and didn't know what to say to Jasper.

"I don't think you should tell anyone else about this. Maybe you should just keep an eye on Bella at school. I don't have any other explanations without further information."

Jasper left not appeased. But he wouldn't push the matter further.

Not one of the Cullens expected what would happen the next day at school.


	4. Chapter 4

**Hello I know it has been a long time. I hope you enjoy the next chapter! I spent a lot of time trying to figure out what is going to happen next. Terisa I am so sorry for not updating in a long time. I have been thinking about updating, but have not gotten around to it until now.**

Bella now had to walk to school, for Drogo had taken away her truck. A long three mile walk to the school with a badly sprained ankle. She was also pretty certain that a couple of ribs had been broken last night.

When she had agreed that Drogo's friends could do whatever they wanted, she hadn't known that it would have been this bad . . . she was bruised everywhere. A plain black sweater had been the best she could find to cover the injuries on her arms and torso, along with a lot of makeup to hid the abrasions on her face.

She was given some strange looks from the teachers and a few students. Bella didn't care about the staring unless someone found out about her captive.

Bella sat down in her seat, wishing it was farther away from the nosey person next to her.

"So what happened to your face?" Jess tried to look concerned, but Bella saw through the act.

"I fell, nothing unusual." The girl fortunately dropped the subject and continued on ignoring the teacher.

Before lunch, Bella had to go to the bathroom. The pain in her abdomen and between her thighs was almost unbearable. She took out some pain medication she hid in her backpack and swallowed them.

'_I need someone to talk to . . . I can't do this alone anymore.'_

She dried away the few tears that had escaped her eyes and went into the cafeteria. Drogo had not given her any money and had taken all of the cash she had stashed. That meant no lunch today.

She just sits down at a vacant table and stares at it trying to keep from breaking down. Across the room, she hears a couple chairs scraping gently on the linoleum and looks up through her bangs.

She winces at the glares she gets.

Jasper, however, was completely baffled at her pain. Yesterday it had been mostly emotional, but now the physical AND the emotional pain were both unbelievable. He thought his head would explode from all that turmoil and chaos.

Bella quickly got up and practically ran out of the lunch room. She needed some kind of release. Her feet led her to the girls' bathroom.

She pulled a razor blade out of her pocket and dragged three deep lines into her arm. Her sobs ceased as her pain numbed.

Pulling out an extra large bandage, she wrapped her arm tightly, knowing she had to sit next to Edward _wince _next period. She had to stop thinking their names.

She was the first one in biology, having skipped out on lunch. Even with the ace bandage on her arm, the smell of blood still made her dizzy and forced her to put her head on her desk.

At the sound of kids starting to come in, she raised her head. Edward came in prepared with a glare just for her. She could hear other students around her whispering about Edward's sudden hatred towards her.

Although, Edward's glare faltered when he smelled her blood, "Why are you bleeding?" his question was deadly serious. As much as he felt hurt by her actions, he still loved her. And this, therefore, kept him protective over her.

"I fell, nothing more than me being a klutz." Bella lied surprisingly well. She couldn't afford to have Drogo become more suspicious and beat her more.

Lucky for her, Edward dropped it. But, her legs hurt so much at the end of class she couldn't get up. He sent her an accusing look.

"Why do you even care?" She didn't understand. The Cullens thought she had cheated on him, why didn't he hate her? Or, why didn't he act like it? "I'll go see your father later." Calling him Carlisle would feel wrong, seeing as they didn't know about Drogo, or at least the truth about what happened (and is happening) between he and Bella.

She rushes out of Mr. Banner's (that is his name right?) room so fast that he wouldn't be able to follow her human speed (and without running).

Drogo had said he would be late tonight, so she stayed late and studied in the library. There was no way she could walk all the way home in her condition. Drogo was now forcing her to walk to and from school every day as an extra punishment, though only god knows for what.

Angela would of course be offering to pick up Bella and take her home, but no one knew that she was now walking home. She stayed in the library until everyone was gone, then she started home.

At 'home', Drogo left a note stating

_I'll be gone for a week or so. Don't you dare eat any of MY food! I will also know if you take any money for lunch. I found your little stash of money you bitch. I WILL punish you when I get home for keeping my things from me. _

_By the way, my friends will be coming over in a few days to keep you company since I am not there. Have fun. . ._

At the end of the cruel note, he left a crude drawing of Bella killing herself. She gasped. Did he want her to kill herself? Truth be told, she actually wanted to at this point.

As the days went on, Bella continued to starve and her body began to wane. Her once small, but feminine curves disappeared to be replaced by nothing, when Drogo returned, he saw how she had changed and liked it. He continued to starve her and made her exercise until she passed and/or dry heaved.

Bella took to guzzling as much water as often as she could so that her stomach would not growl loudly during class.

At the point where she became thinner than Alice, all of the Cullens (including Rose) were concerned. During lunch, Rose came up and sat across from Bella, purposely scraping her chair to capture the other girl's attention.

"Why are starving yourself?" All Rosalie got was silence. Bella put her book down, but didn't look up. She didn't think she would be able to keep the tears at bay once she saw Rose's perfect, beautiful face. A frown marred Rose's face, she was not a very patient person. "Hello? I'm talking to you."

Bella had no idea what to say without making a stupid comment, or making Rose suspicious. She finally looked up at the blonde bombshell. Rose's eyes widened at the pain in her eyes. Bella's eyes didn't even seem to see in front of her, they were just glazed over in pain.

"It doesn't matter. None of you need to bother yourselves with me."

'_I am worthless, defiantly not worthy of your time.'_

Bella stood up lethargically, her whole body hurt from the intense work out session she had done last night. "You should just forget about me."

Rose went and discussed with her family. They would go and find out why exactly the girl they had once loved so much had changed so drastically.

**I know I have not updated in a long while, but hang in with me here. I am trying to plan ahead so I don't get writer's block like I have with "Comply with all your heart" **


	5. Chapter 5

It was decided that Jasper and Carlisle would go to Bella's house and finally figure out what was wrong with her. They could smell the blood before they were even at the front porch.

Bella was lying motionless on the floor with tears pouring out of her eyes. Jasper tried to calm her down, but it was like it didn't affect her at all. She was completely encased in despair, more so than ever.

"Bella?" Carlisle tried to get a reaction from her, but all she did was shut her eyes tightly and whimper. Her appearance was horrifying. Her clothes were so torn that they barely covered anything and she lie in a puddle of her own blood.

They tried to fathom what had happened, but nothing came to mind. For a moment, Jasper thought perhaps she had tried to kill herself, but then he realized how stupid he had been. No matter what the circumstance, there was no way that Bella would commit suicide. She was too strong.

They were trying to think of what to do with her, of how to handle her. She seemed to flinch from the smallest of movements. Carlisle picked her up; she was losing too much blood. His contact seemed electrocute her which made him flinch. It was as if he was going to hurt her.

She was set in the back of his Mercedes and raced to the hospital. He had to sedate her and have Jasper help to be able to do anything. He asked Jasper to step out of the room. There was something bugging him and he didn't want Jasper to be in the room for Bella's privacy.

After he had the test sent in, he started to check her injuries. Innumerable cuts and scars were all over her, but they centered on her thighs. Her legs and hips looked like one massive bruise, with no distinction between old and new.

Carlisle sighed, even without the test he knew what had happened and why Bella had become the way she is. Even though, he could not diagnose without test results. So he waited.

Jasper came back in and was told everything. They discussed what to do. Jasper suggests that maybe the guy that had been in Bella's house was the one who had raped her. This also meant that she didn't cheat on Edward, that all the time the Cullen's had spent degrading and hurting Bella had been unjust and cruel.

Jasper said, "We have to tell them."

"I know. I just can't find the words."

_Ring . . . ring . . . ring . . . _

"HEY!" Carlisle sighed. Emmett's enthusiasm struck him. How could anyone be that joyful when Bella was suffering so much?

"Emmett, get all of the family and run down to the hospital as soon as possible."

"Why what happened? Did Jasper lose his job as a therapist?" **(A/N: I apologize for my horrible joke. I am very bad at humor.)**

"Emmett please, just do it."

"Yup, see you there pops!"

His family filed into his office with curious expressions. "What's wrong dear?" Esme's asked. Carlisle's heart broke even more because he knew that his words would hurt her.

"You all need to sit down. I have some bad news. Don't judge anything I'm going to say and don't interrupt." He pointedly looked at Emmett.

". . . I had a patient come in earlier. She was in really bad shape. There's a lot of evidence that she is abused. I sent for a rape test and it came back positive." At that, Rose's face hardened. No matter how cold and callous she looked, anything about that subject made her reminisce.

"_Doctor Cullen, you're needed down in the ER."_

"All right. I'll be down there in a second."

As he is walking down to the Emeregency Room, he couldn't help but here a couple of the nightshift nurses about Bella's mother Renee. About how she came to Forks after Charlie's death and tried to convince Bella to go with her. Evidentially, Renee said something along the line of Charlie wasn't a good father to Bella anyway. That had set Bella off, and she made her mother leave. Renee left, getting on a plane.

What he heard next was horrible. The plane apparently had engine failure and crashed, killing all of the passengers, killing Renee. The nurses continued to say how unfortunate Bella was, losing the Cullens (although another nurse interjected that Bella had cheated on Edward. She also said that that was good for her daughter, commenting on how Edward Cullen would always have a shoulder to cry on in her daughter.) Her father, and now her mother were dead.

This was even worse, not only was she abused and raped, but she had no one in the world to lean on. Not a shoulder to cry on.

It turns out the front desk had paged him for a strep culture and he asked an ER doc to it for him. The doctor agreed and Carlisle returned to his office where his family was waiting.

His family noticed the change in his composure, but Carlisle was still processing all that he had heard. He sat down and Alice and Emmett impatiently asked what was wrong.

"Not meaning to be rude, but why did you tell us of this girl." Rose asked, who had been sitting quietly in the corner since it had been revealed that the mysterious girl had been raped.

Carlisle took a deep breath and said, "Bella, the girl is Bella."

"No . . ."

**MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I am so evil! I love climaxes. Don't you just hate how they make you wondering what's going to happen next?**

**I felt really bad about not updating so I quickly tried to write a good chapter. I have been caught up in a Spanish presentation that I have to memorize and it's consuming a lot of my time, so I most likely won't be updating until Halloween or early November.**

**Anyways, hope you liked it and until next time. I bid you adieu!**


	6. Chapter 6

Previously . . .

_Em went to go hug, kiss, and comfort his wife. He didn't want her to have to remember all that happened, with Royce and his friends, but she was nowhere to be found._

Emmett looked around, frantic at Rosalie's disappearance. He had been prepared to comfort and console his wife, but she was nowhere to be found.

He stood up, ready to blast off in search of her, when Alice placed her tiny hand on his arm.

"She's taking care of business." She said in an eerie tone. Emmett, even with all the jokes he could have pulled on that lyrical sentence, sat back down and remained quiet. All the Cullens looked at her, wondering what she meant by that statement.

The wind whipped the blonde hair around, covering the figure's face. She eyed the house. She could hear a TV running and a man shouting. Her gaze darkened. She pushed her hand onto the door and practically blew it off its hinges. The putrid smell of alcohol hit her nose, wrinkling it. The balding man fell off of the blood stained couch in surprise. Then he smiled.

"Well, what a lovely young thing. Have you come to see lil' ol' me?"

'_What a sleaze - ball!' _ Rose couldn't believe her ears!

She basically blew the door off its hinges, scaring the evil balding man on the blood stained couch. She screams and yells at him with pure disgust, hate, cruelty and anger on her face, all over her features, and in her voice. It was exactly what he showed to the woman that he did unforgivable thing s to, especially little Bella. Aside from the fact that Rose right now would make a normal person shit their pants, this man was not ordinary in many ways. He thought the "girl" in front of him was just like all the other girls he had raped and broken. He just figured that she was putting on a tough act. He scoffs at her and moves forward, but is shocked to have her fearlessly move forward towards him. "You _will_ die." The embodiment of perfection took pride in driving the man into insanity, never being merciful. And just like Royce, she never once tasted a drop of blood.

Rose found bleach in Bella's washing room and poured it all over the bloody living room. She scrubbed furiously, her anger still flaming. The living room looked cleaner than it had ever been.

When Rose had changed her clothes and washed, she returned to Bella's hospital room. She had her fury in check and under control, so as not to upset Bella.

But Bella wouldn't see them. She refused to talk, speak or acknowledge them.


	7. Chapter 7

**Here I am at 2:07 AM.**

Weeks and weeks of ignoring the Cullens had proved very emotionally draining for Bella. She was constantly tired and withdrawn. She had no one that looked out for her or loved her – besides the Cullens – but they didn't matter to her.

She requested a seat change in Biology, not able to stand the thought of sitting next to - _shudder_ -Edward. That repugnant bastard could burn for all she cared. She hated the looks he would give her, his eyes boring into the back of her skull.

One day as he tried to get her attention, she nearly backhanded him, even though the aftereffect would not be so pleasant for her. she did not make contact with his face, yet Edward still looked like a man burning at the stake.

Alice backed her into a corner one morning, "Why can't you forgive us?"

"Because you didn't give me the benefit of the doubt. You immediately thought to assume the worst. When I was constantly being raped, abused, and tortured by that evil monster, you weren't there to even comfort me let alone protect me! And you can't understand why I won't forgive you?" Bella gave Alice her most miserable and downright wretched glare she could muster. "Go back to _your _family and tell them why I won't forgive them. Don't make me tell them myself, because it won't be pretty."

Alice stopped Bella from turning away by grabbing her hand, "But we didn't know!" she insisted.

Bella flinched from the cold contact, brief flashes of Drogo and what he had done to her flashed through her mind. "You didn't know. And why is that? Did you ever come to see why? NO. You didn't. And I suffered because of it. My father is dead because of it. Our friendship is dead because of it. I don't see how we can ever be friends with this between us. Now let go of my hand." Alice dropped Bella's hand as if it had bitten her.

Alice went to lunch with her family. Silence ensued as they waited for her to relay the news of what had gone down with Bella. Except Alice was busy blocking her mind from Edward who was prying ever so hard to figure out what had gone on. She needed to find what she was going to say and say it fast, or her family would know something was going on.

"She doesn't want us to talk to her right now." Edward's crestfallen face was like a punch in the gut, she had known that that look was coming. "I'm sorry Edward, She's hurt."

"I know that," he began, "And it's my entire fault."

"Come on bro, we all made a mistake." Emmett said with Jasper nodding along. "We all said the same thing. We never even thought to question Alice's vision."

Rosalie remained silent, knowing exactly what was going on through Bella's head. She knew gaining back Bella's trust wasn't going to be as easy as her family thought. Opening her mouth wouldn't get them anywhere. They would just say she didn't care enough, which was partially true. She hadn't cared at all about Bella before all of this happened. Things were different now. Current circumstances changed a lot of things that were revolving around in Rose's mind. Things that not even the Cullen's could understand. In a way, Bella was a kindred soul to her. Both lost family, both lost their innocence in a way no one should ever have to experience, both lost a piece of themselves. But maybe they could find that in each other one day. Maybe that day would be the day that Bella could forgive someone.

Rosalie would play it by ear, protecting Bella from her family and from Bella herself. Bella didn't need to be hurting herself, intentional or not. It would only complicate matters further.

Tonight, Rose would be paying Bella Swan a visit.

**Whew, it has been WAY too long since I last updated and I am so sorry for that! I understand what it is like waiting for a chapter, but it really doesn't feel as long when you're the writer :/ **

**Anywho, I really hope you enjoyed this chapter! R&R! BTW, Have any of you seen that new show on ABC, Switched at Birth? I am loving it!**


	8. Chapter 8

_**I'm Back! It's been quite a while, but I have been tossing up different ideas of what to do with the rest of the story. If anyone has any ideas of where to go with this, either tell me in a review, P. message me, or email me.**_

_Rosalie remained silent, knowing exactly what was going on through Bella's head. She knew gaining back Bella's trust wasn't going to be as easy as her family thought. Opening her mouth wouldn't get them anywhere. They would just say she didn't care enough, which was partially true. She hadn't cared at all about Bella before all of this happened. Things were different now. Current circumstances changed a lot of things that were revolving around in Rose's mind. Things that not even the Cullen's could understand. In a way, Bella was a kindred soul to her. Both lost family, both lost their innocence in a way no one should ever have to experience, both lost a piece of themselves. But maybe they could find that in each other one day. Maybe that day would be the day that Bella could forgive someone._

_Rosalie would play it by ear, protecting Bella from her family and from Bella herself. Bella didn't need to be hurting herself, intentional or not. It would only complicate matters further._

_Tonight, Rose would be paying Bella Swan a visit._

Bella scrubbed her floors, using bottle after bottle of bleach, even though Rosalie had removed all traces of blood from the furniture and flooring. Tears slipped down her face, her sobs ripping through her chest. She was alone in the house. _Alone. _No Charlie, Renee, Alice, Emmett, Jasper, Esme, Carlisle, _**Edward**_**.** Hell, she even missed Rosalie. And no matter how hard she cried nobody would comfort her, because she herself had pushed them away.

"I need something." What that was, however, no one knew. Bella finished the floors, throwing the multiple jugs of bleach into the garbage bin.

Stomach rumbling, Bella startled from the sudden noise. She opened the pantry.

No food.

She ran upstairs to Charlie's old room, taking off the sheets and blankets and getting into the rip on the underside of the mattress. When she had first come to Forks, her late father had shown her the place in his old mattress. Cash. Lots of cash, and she had forgotten about it until now.

Sticking her hand into the lumpy mattress, she pulled handfuls of cash out in the form of one hundred dollar bills. Bella probably held $5,000 in her hands. 'How could a cop of a small town attain this kind of money?' She pondered. However he did, she didn't ponder any further.

She would need to make a run to the grocery and a mall for she had little clothing left. A pang went through her as the thought of shopping reminded her of Alice.

She still had to figure out what she was going to do with all of Charlie's things. Drogo had thrown out most of his clothes, but she didn't really know about other things. Her father hadn't really been a sentimental person, so even if Drogo hadn't touched that type of thing, there wouldn't be much for her to have.

Just as she had speculated except for the bed, side table, dresser, and shelf, there wasn't much in the room. She went through all the drawers in the dresser and sadly did not find anything. To her surprise, however, there was a manila folder in her father's side table beside the bed.

Opening it up, she found a thick stack of photos of herself, from the time she was born to a few months ago. A couple photos of her mother were in there also. Tears came to her eyes. She hadn't even known Charlie had had all this. These photos really showed her and reminded her how much he had loved her. The lump in her throat was hard to clear.

Bella took the manila folder into her room and just went through the many photos of her mom and her. She had a hard time falling asleep from emotions ripping through her. The pain of losing Charlie had waned and she was left with the wonder of what she could do with the rest of her life. The past was behind her and the future ahead.

_**Thanks for reading my story! R&R**_

_**Please, if you have any ideas for this story TELL ME!**_


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 10

Bella munched on a turkey club sandwich. It felt so good to have a full stomach, but she almost didn't want to. She liked being skinny. It made her more like _them. _All she wanted was to be perfect. Perfect skin, perfect eyes – everything.

With a sigh, she set the food down. Why was it so hard for her to do anything without thinking of them. Damn it! They just wouldn't leave her alone anywhere she went. She couldn't even get some peace and quiet in her own head and that's all she wanted. Peace. Somewhere she could lie down and fade away into the scenery without having to worry about feeling or thinking. Somewhere she could look at something and not have it remind her of a family she wanted to forget.

But that seemed out of her grasp. All she had was this house with so many good and bad memories, memories of Charlie and that man. Would she ever be able to return to the person she was?

An undeniable range swept through her. Why had this happened to her? What did she do to deserve this? What was so wrong with her that it made someone want to hurt her? She didn't deserve this! This was not the life she wanted. She wanted out. A picture of her precious blade flashed in her mind. No. She had decided that she wasn't going to do that. It would just make Charlie sad if he ever new she had even thought about anything like that.

_Knock, Knock, Knock_

The three taps were like ice on her anger. Who would that be? She got up to answer the door, hesitating for a moment, unsure of whom it was.

She cracked the door, then upon seeing whom it was, shoved the door back shut. Why was she here? Rosalie had no reason to come to Bella's house. The blonde had never liked her nor had she been fond of her recently.

"Bella, open the door."

"Why?"

"I need to talk to you about what's happened. Let me in and I'll explain. Please."

It took Bella a moment to be able to let Rosalie in. "Come in, I guess."

With a slight smile to the shorter girl, Rose walked into the living room.

"There really isn't anywhere to sit. I had to throw out a lot of the furniture. Blood, you know."

"Bella, I need you to listen to a story. Did Edward," _wince, _"sorry, did he ever tell you about how I was turned?"

"No. Why?"

"Well, my story is similar to yours, except the ending was quite a bit different. Back then, your parents picked your marriages and mine had picked a man named Royce. I hadn't ever really talked with him in depth. He seemed nice enough. I was walking down the street to my parents house and saw a bunch of men coming towards me. It was Royce and his friends. They had been drinking at a bar, and drinking heavily. Royce saw me and said some very lewd comments. I am not going to tell you specifics and make you remember anything you don't want to, but I am sure that you can imagine what went on from there.

"Bella, I just want you to know that you can come to me for anything. I will never tell anyone what you tell me. I understand what you must be feeling right now, but you need to know that you will get through this. This is part of healing. I don't blame you if you never want to talk to any of us again, but please, don't hold all of your feelings in. It will make you want to do unspeakable things. I did get to unleash my anger on the men that did those awful things to me, but don't bloody your hands. It's not worth it."

By the time Rosalie had finished, tears were running down Bella's face. She wanted to have someone to talk to. She didn't want to be alone anymore. Rose pulled the sobbing girl into her arms and let her cry all the pain out. This was the first time Bella had truly broken down and let her feelings out. It was quite some time before either of them moved.

"Bella, I just want you to know that I am here for you. Don't ever be afraid to come to for anything. It may not seem like it, but I do love you. You are a part of my family, even if you don't consider yourself as such."

"No, Rose, I really appreciate this. Thank you for being so nice to me."

**Well. How long has it been? 9 months? It seems like it. I really am sorry for how long it has been, but I am not giving up on my stories! So please keep following! Read and review! Love you guys.**


	10. Chapter 10

**Hello! Someone asked me how my friend was doing in a review and I wanted to let everyone know she is much better. She is in counseling and is doing well. I don't know if I have said during what book this is, but it is in the earlier stages of New Moon. Edward left, Bella was catatonic and all that happened. However, she did not jump off the cliff and the whole thing with the Volturi never happened. If I have mentioned the time period before, please PM me **

The smell of pancakes wafted into Bella's nose. Her eyes flashing open, she sat up quickly to find herself in her bed. She didn't remember going upstairs last night. Rose had stayed a while after Bella had broke down and they had talked about everything that came to mind. Rose rented a chick flick and they curled up on the couch. 'I must have fallen asleep.' Bella blushed, noticing she was in pajamas. Rose must have undressed her. She had seen her ugly, scarred body.

Tossing the covers off, Bella grabbed some clothes and went to take a shower. Avoiding mirrors had become a habit of hers. She didn't want to see the face of the person she had become. Steam poured from the bathroom as Bella turned the water to scalding and started to scrub her skin, turning it red and opening scabs from previous sessions of scrubbing. Then, alarm bells sounded in her head. She wouldn't be able to scrub like she usually did. There was a vampire in her downstairs! She stopped her motions and finished on with her shower.

After towel drying her hair and dressing in a simple t-shirt and jeans, Bella walked down to meet her guest.

"Rose?"

"Over here." Rose was sitting at the kitchen table with a huge stack of pancakes and a container of syrup next to her. "I didn't know how much humans tend to eat so I made the whole box of pancake mix."

Bella's eyes bugged out, "You made that whole thing?" Rose just smiled and pointed to the seat across form her. "So what are you doing here?" Then, realizing how rude she sounded, she quickly rephrased herself, "Not that I don't want you here, but you never, at least before yesterday, showed any signs of not hating me."

"Oh Bella, I never hated you." Bella raised her eyebrows at this. "I have always been jealous of you. You're human. You have your entire life ahead of you to spend it with whomever you want. You can grow old with that person. I have never hated you. I was simply jealous."

"What life? No one will ever want me. I'm dirty."

"Bella you're not! What that evil _thing" _spitting the word out "– did to you does not make you dirty. It isn't your fault for what happened to you." Rose took the brunette by the shoulders and made sure her point got across. "Never blame yourself, no good will come of it. It may take you sometime to be okay with yourself, but please, don't harm yourself."

The human girl turned and looked at Rose strangely, "What makes you thing I would hurt myself?"

"Bella please, I know what you're going through."

Bella looked away, not knowing how to respond or even what to think. "So where did you learn to cook?"

"Esme made all of us learn to make a few dishes in case you ever needed something. Looks like it came in handy after all." Rose explained with a soft smile.

The question of why Rose was being so nice again flashed through Bella's mind. It just seemed so strange that the blonde bombshell could want to be something like the human girl. Why would she want to be human? Rosalie was the most beautiful person, regardless of the fact that she is a vampire, on the planet. Pondering the question while she put a single pancake on her plate, she could not come up with any plausible answer. "Rose, may I ask you a question?"

"Of course, Bella. What about?"

"What do you want to be human?"

Rosalie sighed. "When I was human I never worried about anything. My family was rich. I was engaged, living at the top of society. My best friend however, wasn't as well off. She did live comfortably, with a wonderful husband and baby on the way. Up until that point I hadn't even though about children, but as soon as I saw those cute little dimples, I knew I wanted them. It was on that day when that child was born that Royce did what he did and Carlisle found me." She took a pause, allowing Bella to soak it all in. "Did you know that I was intended to be with Edward?" Bella shook her head no, eyes wide. "As soon as he heard my thoughts however, he knew he didn't want me.

"Part of the reason I was so mean to you for a long time was that Edward wanted you, but not me. I'm a very vain person." A wry smile came into place. "It was silly of me. However, most of the reason why I was so jealous of you was because you can still have children. Yes, I know I would be dead if Carlisle hadn't changed me, but I still feel a whole part of me missing."

Bella looked at the vampire across from her and reached forward, giving her a hug. She could feel Rose go still, probably from the shock of receiving a hug. Slowly Rose's arms wrapped themselves around the smaller girl. They stayed like that for a few moments then pulled away.

"You're a good friend Rose."

Rosalie smiled, "You too. Now, finish your food."

After all the food had been put away, Bella laughed, saying "I won't have to make breakfast for weeks." Sobering for a moment, she realized that this was probably the first time she had genuinely laughed since the incident.

_Ring Ri–_

Rose snatched her phone out of her pocket, silencing the ringer quick enough that Bella would never notice. The only people that would call her would be her family. Glancing at the caller ID, sure enough, it was Alice. A small beep then sounded, telling Rose that she had a text.

Opening the message, it read:

_Rose, answer your phone! We actually care about Bella, unlike you! If you don't answer right away, Edward is coming over,  
-A_

Typing so fast, her fingers would blur to a human's eye, Rose sent back a reply:

_Alice don't you dare have anyone come over here! Bella is too fragile to see any of you. Seeing Edward or you would just crush her. Stay away! I'm warning you.  
-R_

Rose shut her phone and silenced all sounds. She didn't want Bella to open her phone because of the ringer going off. The girl's curiosity would just lead her to finding a text from one of the other Cullens and lord knows what Alice would do if she could contact Bella. No, Rose would protect Bella from them unless Bella wanted their company. Though it was doubtful Bella would ever forgive them. Rose felt lucky enough that Bella accepted her being there. She did not want to screw things up with Alice interfering.

Bella had taken the time alone to clean off the dishes and put the excess pancakes in Tupperware for future days.

"You really did surprise me with how well you can cook." She smiled at the blonde, closing the refrigerator door. "I've always been the cook in the family. Renee could never focus long enough. She always burnt food and Charlie never learned to make anything."

"It's actually quite fun. I really hated it at first, but it was grown on me. You're the only one I can actually cook for, being the only human friend I have."

"I'm honored you consider me a friend, but how do you make it taste so good if you can't taste it yourself?"

Rose smiled for a spell. "I can still smell it as you do and with taste and smell being so closely related, I can just tell. Plus, I remember some things from my human life."

"So are we doing anything today? I mean, uh, I didn't mean to presume that we were –"

"It's fine Bella. I don't mind. I didn't have anything planned. Did you have something in mind?"

Bella was silent. However, as an idea popped into her head, she smiled and said, "Have you ever ridden motorcycle?"

**Well, thanks again for reading my stories. Please review and tell me what you think of it so far. If you have any ideas about where the story should go, please say your thoughts! I appreciate any influence you guys have on my stories and love your input. I am going to be revamping the previous chapters and taking out the annoying middle-of-the-chapter A/N: notes. Anyways, thanks for reading and R&R!**

**~Hemeophage**


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